A brush with a Brian Rix-type farce

I use eBay quite a lot and rarely have any issues with it, but I have to relate this, with hindsight, quite ridiculous story. I know some folks really despise eBay but I’ve never fathomed why.

 

A few weeks back I ordered a set of 10 small modelling paint brushes, but only one of the set arrived through my letter box a few days later. I contacted the seller to tell them what had happened and that the packaging was intact so the other 9 brushes could not have fallen out. I even told them which of the individually numbered brushes I actually received. Of course, I asked them to send me the other 9 brushes.

The response was simply that what was dispatched to me was what I ordered. I pointed out in return that what I ordered was 10 paint brushes but only one had arrived. I got no further response.

So what next? A grumble to eBay which a few days later ended up with them telling me that the seller had informed them that I’d got what I ordered so no refund was due to me.

I appealed, pointing out, again, that I only received 1 of the 10 paint brushes, that I didn’t want a refund, I just wanted the seller to send me the other 9.

eBay then came back to me saying I was due a refund (what I’d specifically NOT asked for) and that I’d soon get a pre-paid return address label to send the one paint brush I actually held back! By my calculations I then had no paint brushes at all!

The label arrived and the single brush was despatched back to the seller. But why did the seller want a single brush back, when they could have spent the postage sending me the other 9 brushes? It’s been a brush with a mad, mad world, but at least I got a refund for the 10 paint brushes that I've now had to order from another eBay seller..

*****

For the youngsters amongst you Brian Rix was an actor-manager, who produced a record-breaking sequence of long-running farces on the London stage. I think he’d be proud of my little farce.

 

Why trams won’t be appearing in Liverpool

No, don’t worry, this is not another rehearsal of why ‘Merseytram’ failed back in the early 2000’s. That one has done the rounds probably too many times!

 

Back when the Tories were in power (pre June 2024) they allocated money to Liverpool City Region for transport infrastructure improvements and Labour has, in effect, confirmed that chunk of money. As any Merseysider will know the money is in significant part to pay for buses dressed up as trams and they’ll be running, we’re told, to Liverpool (John Lennon) Airport. Readers with longer memories will recall the first ‘Merseytram’ line was NOT going to go to Liverpool Airport and that caused quite a stink back then. So the City Region leaders knew what would happen if they talked about any new transport infrastructure without making an airport link, from the city centre, a priority.

Bendy-Buses!

Why not resurrect the tram scheme and build the first line to……. well you know where? Well, what they actually came up with were ‘Bendy-Buses/Boris-type Buses/Gliders’ (there may well be more names for them but I’ll omit the rude ones), in effect buses dressed up as trams and it seems our Labour gov’ confirmed the money could be spent on them. So, I guess, we’ll be getting them at some point.

Tram Raid

But why no trams? I’d always thought that the Tory and now Labour governments would be reluctant to fund trams in Liverpool/Merseyside due to cost and maybe the political hang-over from the ‘Merseytram’ demise. I had no evidence of this but felt that was the situation. Then Private Eye No.1672 (3^rd to 16^th April) dropped through my letter box and bingo on page 17 under its ‘Signal Failures’ column my thoughts were effectively confirmed under the heading ‘Tram Raid’.

West Yorks shunted back into sidings

Yes, that article is actually all about the farce over in West Yorkshire where their long promised tram/light rail system has been given more green then red lights than you could shake a stick at. And yes, of course, it’s been kicked back into the long political grass once again. But it’s the reason why it’s been kicked into the long grass that links to Liverpool City Region not proposing a tram system. You see it’s the words ‘might not be trams after all’ and ‘check whether [wait for it] buses would be more viable’ in that Private Eye article that made the penny drop for me. In essence Liverpool City Region was almost certainly told, by the last Tory government, don’t ask for a tram system as we won’t fund it and despite Labour coming to power in June 2024 the ‘advice’ has still been the same.

No Merseytram II

So now I think we know why Liverpool City Region leaders put in a transport bid for bendy-buses when, like West Yorks, local folk were fully expecting Merseytram II to be proposed by our local leaders. They didn’t bid for what they knew we all wanted/needed on Merseyside because they’d been told not to bother and they didn’t want to end up in the eternal shall we/shan’t we position that poor old West Yorks is in! Pragmatic, you could say, but my feeling is that settling for 3^rd best in a contest where trams were both number 1 and 2 could well come back to haunt Liverpool/Merseyside Labour leaders.

                                             What Liverpool won't be getting - 

A Geater Manchester Metro tram in Rochdale